Medical Recap

I`ve been happily married since 2010, for the 1st year of marriage we didn`t really `trying to conceive`. Just like most couple who just married, we wanted it happens the natural way as we enjoy our days as a Newlyweds, without getting too keen about `go to doctor to have a baby`.

When we celebrated our 2nd wedding anniversary, that`s the time when we started to worried about this `having a baby` thing. Since other couple, friends, families even neighbors who just married less than a year was already conceived or have babies.

Medical recap before married

2007

Check to Doctor about having a severe period cramps

Doctor 1, She did a visual inspection of cervix using a speculum

Diagnose result: I got the normal cervix.

Treatment: Vitamins to balanced my hormon.

Result: period cramps still go on

Doctor 2, She did a USG checked to examine my uterus and asked me to have blood test for cancer its called CA 125.

Diagnose result: Uterus was fine. Blodd test cancer Negative.

Treatment: Therapy hormononal for 6 months

Result: period cramps still go on.

2008

Doctor 3, He did a Transvaginal USG to look at the uterus, ovaries, and cervix.

Diagnose result: No sign of ovarium cyst. Thank God!

Treatment: He said I was okay, nothing to be worried about. He said its more to psychological matter..

Result: I end up (still) crying out loud once a month.. :(

Medical Recap after married:

2011

Check to Ob.Gyn about Pregnancy

Doctor 1, She did a Transvaginal USG it was in my 1st day of period after 10 days of late period (that was my 1st time late period, I got a big hope on this, but it turned out to be period)

Diagnose result: She worried about me getting the ectopic pregnancy, so she also suggested me to have blood test for pregnancy, its called HcG. 

 

USG result

Result: Nope! It was just a late period. That`s all. I came home with tears (-___-) She asked me to get the HSG test at the 9th day from the 1st day of period.

but I was already torn apart with the result, why not even a slight of chance that I got pregnant.. It breaks my hope.. so I decided to take a break for a while..

2012

Go to Acupuncture Doctor

What a long days for break I took huh? a year for one failed result? I am so lame -___-
So, this year I heard acupuncture has its unique way to cure disease or at least boost fertility, some of my friends succeed, so why not try?

Doctor, asked me to have upper and lower abdominal USG to measure and check the internal organs that may has caused the severe cramps and fertility problems. 

Diagnose result:  Everything`s fine some of them excellent.

Treatment: I take the acupuncture treatment for the next couple months. Then She asked me to have the HSG test and semen test

I guess, I was a total lame, I can`t do it right.. always stops in the middle of the way.. Everytime I get the unwanted result, I get so upset and losing the interest.. So here I am.. Decided to take a break again.. (-__-)

  

 

Ebi Furai

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Ebi Furai

Ebi Furai is Japanese deep fried prawn coated with flour, beaten eggs and breadcrumbs. My hubby looooveedd it so much! He often enjoy them with kikkoman soy sauce and Kewpie mayonnaise.

Kewpie Mayonnaise

STEP 1: Clean 6 - 7pcs prawn

Remove the head

Peel the skins

Leave the tails intact

Don`t forget to always cut off the intestine at the back.

cut off the intestine at the back

STEP 2: Prep the seasoning

• In a small bowl, mix plain flour, salt, paper and garlic powder
• In a bowl two, beat 2 eggs evenly
• In bowl three, mix the panko breadcrumbs and dry parsley 

STEP 3:  Coated and fry!

• Heat the oil first
• Dip each prawn into the seasoning flour
• Then dip into the beaten eggs
• Then into the panko breadcrumbs
• Coat well
• Cook it until golden brown
• Drain the oil on a paper towel
• Serve!

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Strawberry Creamy Sweet Milk

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Thought about having simple dessert this night.. and I came up with the idea of dipping a fresh strawberry into a creamy sweet milk.

Simply put the fresh strawberries into a small fine bowl and the milk in other cutey cup.. It feels like enjoying a strawberry dipped in somewhere fancy restaurant! (^_^)
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When Everybody is Pregnant or Had Just Have Babies and We are Not

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I feel so isolated

when I came into my friend`s baby`s birthday or baby showers, I saw pregnant friends, I saw new born babies, I saw how they smiled while holding their babies. They`re talking about how to bathe their babies, they`re talking about buying baby stuffs together, etc... while I was stood there feels like all alone.. no baby.. no baby-bump yet... nothing to talk about.. just standing there alone and pretend like I`m okay while I died a litte inside..

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I feel so different

everytime someone asking me about how long I`ve been married? I`m started to feel uncomfortable, because I know their next question must be `do I have a baby yet?` and it such a great reminder of HOW DIFFERENT I AM compares to MOST WOMEN... and It hurts so much.. -___-

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I feel upset

At the end of the day all I feel the most is upset. Upset for not being trusted to carry a baby on my own yet! Upset for not being trusted to be a Mother! Because I know I would be a damn good Mother compares to some ungrateful moms out there. I feel Upset because I`ve done the best I could to live a healthy life, to take all those tests, but still coming empty. Sometimes at night I talked to God and question my worth before God..

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I feel hopeless

Days that turns into years, strength that turns into tears, positive thought that turns into emptiness and hopes that turns into broken hearts. I`m no angel, I have feelings, my patience have its limit, sometimes I feel so hopeless.. too hopeless even just simply to going to ObGyn.. too hopeless even just to talking about baby.. There are days when I want nothing..  and I`d cry a river when I hear a baby`s crying in TV.. Sounds great huh?

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Feeling Guilty

• feel guilty for spending all day at home doing nothing but watching CSI while snacking lays and enjoying a glass of Ice Milo, having a -lazy ass- day at my bed, while husband is somewhere out there, probably don`t have time to eat his lunch.

• when it comes to hubby`s birthday! I feel guilty because I bought him gift -practically- using money that he`s given me. Sometimes I wish I was earned my own money, so I could buy him gift without using his money.

• there is a time when the bills going crazy that`s when I practically feel guilty because there isn't anything financially that I can do to help.

• my father paid my college -in hoping- I could living-up my potential and contributing something good at large. By being a SAHW I often feel guilty for not fulfilling his will, mostly not fulfiling my other potential.

Yakitori

Yakitori is one of Japanese signature dishes. Basically made from dize-sized pieces of chicken meat that skewered on a bamboo skewer and grilled. My Yakitori is so delicate and juicy. Easy to made!

STEP 1: Marinate the dice-sized chicken meat

•     cut 1/2 part of chicken breast into a dize-sized
•     place them into a bowl
•     pour 3 tbsp Kikkoman Soy Sauce
•     1 tbsp sesame oil
•     1 tbsp sweet soy sauce
•     1 finger of shredded ginger
•     salt and paper
•     mix them all and leave it for 30 min
•     boil a water, put the marinated chicken meat into a hot boil water, 2 min is enough. (note: use a little amount of water)

STEP 2: Cut them into a dice-sized

•     1/2 of tomatoes
•     2 sticks of onion leaf
•     1/2 of boiled potato
•     2 pcs of red or green paprica (optional)

STEP 3: Skewered them all and grilled

•     skewered 2 dice-sized chicken meat with other veggies
•     prepare the grill-pan, pour with 1tsp of vegetable oil and 1 tsp of margarine
•     apply the marinated sauce to the skewered chicken meat.
•     grill them about 15 min until it delicately cooked

ENJOY! :p